Feel like a fraud sometimes? How do you overcome imposter syndrome?
Franziska Kroll
73 replies
Have you ever had the thought youโve only succeeded due to luck and not because of your talent or qualifications? And thus, don't feel like you deserve to be where you are?
What are your tips and tricks to get your head straight again?
Replies
Maxim Zubarev@mxmzb
shouldigrowabeard.com
I don't ever really feel like an actual "imposter". The closest thing that gets to it is when I am doubting I bring enough value to the table (which, based on the situation, I won't always blame on myself, e.g. when I simply do what someone needs me to do and not more it's their active decision to limit me as a resource).
That's a very specific thing you can change however, so whenever I feel like I should bring more value I will take this as an impulse to bring my value up. Even just starting to think how to improve myself and my capabilities and abilities is a valueable beginning to actually improving those things. Then further down the road I may go and learn a new skill, a new tool, or go through a new valueable experience.
What comes from this at some point (if it didn't before) I will start getting constant real-time and real-world confirmation with the people I work with that I am in fact not an imposter, which makes it pretty hard and pretentious to still think I might be one.
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Product Hunt
I don't have an answer for this, so I'm here watching the comments hoping someone else does ๐
@aaronoleary I feel you!
Yup feel like this all the time - not sure I've really got over it!
@maxwellcdavis Totally! Maybe it's something one never trily gets over
PH Hunters
I feel Imposter syndrome mainly arises from social media consumption where everyone appears to be an expert in something. But the Truth is nobody knows everything. Even the CEO's. I've seen this first hand.
Just stay curious about your work and find ways to keep improving. That's all there is to do.
@nithin_jawahar very good advice :)
Sessions
I'll say... by trusting in others.
We may find ourselves in a position of power or with a lot of responsibilities, and it may feel like all of these things have just happened by a string of unlikely coincidences.
It may feel like for all these years, we've just managed to trick people into believing that we are competent. I believe that the source of these thoughts is something I'd call the... hubris of our mind. Thinking we actually know better than others, subconsciously or not, while in actuality, we hardly ever do.
And yet, even the information we base these thoughts on is made out of things we ourselves have noticed, disregarding all the other things we have not. You might think about how anxious you were to complete a task, ignoring how you actually managed to research, develop, test and fix the thing, and how that takes a lot of skill in itself.
I think that's when it's important to have trustworthy people around you whom you respect in times like these, who can give you a less biased opinion. Kind of like... you don't have to carry the weight of the world by yourself situation. Anyway, this has inadvertently turned into a wall of text. I wish you best of luck!
Collato
I was supposed to lead a team at 25 and had no clue what I was doing. I suppose being open about it always helps
@chetan_natesh that is a really good and empowering way to look at it :)
@ivo_scherkamp yes I have also found that people are suprisingly supportive in these situations :)
@ivo_scherkamp not knowing an answer is ok, being the quickest to admit lack of knowledge and quickly being able to gather that knowledge - that is the key.
@franziska_kroll Thank you Franziska ๐
Outdone
Seeing discussions like this and seeing that everyone else suffers from imposter syndrome is certainly comforting, in an odd way. If everyone is an imposter, then nobody is!
@jonathan_nass OMG yes! It really is! So maybe it is more about the assumptions we have of others than of ourselves?
Outdone
@franziska_kroll I think it must be! It's easy to look around and think everyone knows what they're doing. I think we're all good at hiding it๐
wait wahat...is thats actually a thing
@andrewcanday haha yes unfortunately it is :/
Imposter syndrome is a common feeling, especially among high-achieving individuals. It can be difficult to overcome, but here are a few tips that might help:
1. Acknowledge your feelings and recognize that imposter syndrome is a common experience.
2. Remember that everyone has moments of self-doubt and that it's normal to feel like an imposter sometimes.
3. Focus on your accomplishments and the things you have achieved, rather than dwelling on your feelings of inadequacy.
4. Ask for feedback from others and seek support from friends, family, or a therapist who can help you work through your feelings of imposter syndrome.
5. Remember that imposter syndrome is a psychological phenomenon, and it doesn't reflect your actual abilities or worth as a person.
Ultimately, the key to overcoming imposter syndrome is to recognize that your feelings are not a true reflection of your abilities or worth as a person. It's important to remind yourself of your accomplishments and to seek support from others when you need it.
@anshaj_goyal so insightful ๐งก I wish I could upvote more than once
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Believe in yourself and constantly remind yourself about accepting as things are. Because in reality everything is always different than what you have in your head.
Also, having a little luck by your side is not wrong. All you gotta do is change your thought process and think in a direction where you're more content and accepting about almost everything. :)
@rupal_sharma3 that seems like great advice though it's probably easier said than done :)
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@franziska_kroll Yeah, the ultimate choice lies within. But its no harm trying!
I dont think iโll ever get over it๐ซ
@abid_unnisa Do you feel it gets better with time and experience?
@franziska_kroll i dont really felt so. But plus point is i keep working to get better and get better opportunities. Optimistic much?๐
Take a break. Seeing the big picture can work wonders.
Also, a nap helps.
Without luck very few succeed.
So assuming some of the achieved results was because of luck is in all probability true making it the correct starting point.
From there what you need to be honest about is , are you giving 100 % and are you ready to continue giving 100 percent as long as it takes.
If yes, then go ahead without fear. Nobody ever did anything with all that was required from step one.
@chetan_natesh I love this! Yes we should accept that also luck is part of the equation and trust that we are where we are for the right reasons!
@franziska_kroll Correct, right reasons for both yourself ๐ and also for the market ๐๐
I think the phrase "Act confident and no one will question you" generally is true ๐
In the meantime, trust your intuition, listen to those with experience, always be open to learning, and help those who are also trying to learn and grow.
@catherine_norris that is great advice :)
Yep, I often feel like this!
Are they ever going to find out that I'm a fraud?
I try to answer this question quickly: "They are very smart. They would know already, so you're not a fraud!
@mimih_arteaga hahaha I love this!
OpenMat โข Make it Meaningful
Jiu jitsu! Emotion follows motion, especially when you share yourself with friends.
Once in a better mental state, plan and follow through. We are our actions.
@parker_revers I like this approach. thank you for sharing
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@jason_andries1 What usually helps for me is seeing some startups having the worst and "scammiest" looking websites or even a worse product yet still getting sales. It helps me know that selling is king, and there's always people with far less than you who make it far bigger because they put themselves out there and aren't fretting over what they're lacking.
@richard_gao2 it is all about getting started not wondering too mcuh about it, it seems :D
@jason_andries1 wise words! Thank you!
It helps to know that 83% of the people here feel the same as me ๐ค
@john_morrison1 it so does!
It's normal to feel out of place sometimes; at times it feels like you're pretending to be someone you're not or like you're not an expert or good enough. You fear that if others knew your flaws they might not accept you. But it turns out that:
- If you're not a celebrity or a big name in your space, no one is paying much attention to your mistakes (Okay, maybe except for me).
- Even experts feel that way too, perhaps even more, as they have their careers on the line.
I've learned that imposter syndrome is but a mindset of fear of possible rejection. I think the best way to deal with it is to not be an imposter. You become an imposter because you believe it.
- Share like a beginner.
- Be open-minded and admit when you're wrong.
- Believe in what you say. Confidence is a reflection of what you're thinking.
- You will make mistakes 80% of the time, but these mistakes make you authentic. Perfection is overrated.